A new author to me, I became aware of this novel when I saw that it had won Best Novel in the Ngaio Marsh Awards 2023 (an award made for the best crime, mystery, or thriller novel written by a New Zealand citizen or resident, published in New Zealand during the previous year).

Life’s Turning Point

Emily, a middle aged children’s book illustrator, living alone in London, receives a call from her father’s neighbour Raewyn in Tawanui, New Zealand to say she ought to come, that her father Felix’s memory is deteriorating, the dementia much worse than when she last visited. The neighbour has been voluntarily helping him out, her son leases land off him, their families have been close for many years.

Emily is the youngest, her brother and sister though nearer have reasons why they can’t help. Not only does her father not recognise her when she first arrives, but the house is full of notes he has written to himself, an attempt to slow down the fast encroaching disease.

Notes To Self

He held up the envelope. ‘Something for you to look after.’
‘What’s this?’
‘Keep it for me, will you? Please, please, don’t open it until the event mentioned on the front. Until then, I’d rather you didn’t let anyone know of its existence. I will undoubtedly forget I’ve give it to you. I’m afraid I’m going doolally.’

Her return coincides with the 25th anniversary since Raewyn’s daughter Leah disappeared without a trace, last seen by Emily who was working in a petrol station where Leah bought something before going into the local bush on one of her conservation research trips, trying to save an endangered snail species from predators, but making a few enemies in the process. She was never seen again.

‘I envy you,’ she says.

She doesn’t. Why would she envy me? She’s Dr Leah Parata, five years older and infinitely, effortlessly superior. Everything about the woman screams energy and competence, even the way she’s twirling that turquoise beanie around her index finger. She’s tall, light on her feet, all geared up for back-country hiking in a black jacket – or maybe navy blue, as I’ll later tell the police.

The Slow Unravelling

Though she had never been close to her father, now that his short term memory is failing and his guard is slipping, she comes to realise there is much about her father she did not know, both in the way he cared and the terrible secrets he has kept.

Emily, I’m lost in the mist, I’m sliding into an abyss. You can’t begin to imagine the terror.’

Determined not to put him into care, as her siblings prefer, Emily decides to stay, reconnecting with her own past and begins to unravel what has been covered up and must decide what to do about it.

It’s an evocative read that brings the reader deep into the east coast North Island setting of a small town in the foothills of the bush covered Ruahine Mountain Range. It creates a strong sense of its locals, both those who stay and those who leave, all of whom have a history and connections, who harbour secrets, fear judgement and maintain strong loyalties, especially when outsiders come into the community.

It’s a slow unravelling of the mystery of Leah’s disappearance and the revelation of who a father really is to his daughter, as time runs out and he begins to forget not just who she is, but who he is himself and the important final task he has set himself.

Author, Charity Norman

Charity Norman was born in Kampala, Uganda, the seventh child of missionary parents, raised in Yorkshire and Birmingham. A barrister specialising in crime, family law and mediation, in 2002 she took a break from law and moved with her family to New Zealand and began a writing career.

She has written seven novels, See You in September (2017) and The Secrets of Strangers (2020) were both shortlisted for the Ngaio Marsh Award for crime novel. The New Woman/The Secret Life of Luke Livingstone was selected for the BBC Radio 2 Book Club. Remember Me (2022) was a Ngaio Marsh Award winner.